Bo Burnham

Welcome to Youtube


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Before Youtube I walked through life...
And now I frolic.
Youtube's been like a farther to me, except you Youtube's not an Al-coholic
Before Youtube I was just a skinny white kid that though he was funnier and cooler then he actually was...
And now... Well, not much has changed but I have a shitload of money.
Cause Youtube is a place for people to share their ideas..
If by people you mean 13 year old girls and by ideas you mean how they love the Jonas Brothers...
I'm just kidding but let's be honest, that's a hefty majority...
And you if don't believe me... Well then you must be a noob

[Chorus]
So, welcome to Youtube,
You don't know what you're missing, just try searching women kissing
It's Youtube,
It's what this countries been needing a generation of kids who don't wast their time reading.
Am I the only one that thinks that Lisa Nova's hot?
And Chris Crockers not.... No...
He's hotter...
[Chorus]

Most of the best youtubers are either Asian or they're gay
So there's an untapped youtube celebrity, and it's name is Geore Takai.
And your favorite coat has got a doo-doo stain, I pray to god that that's chocolate rain
And I find videos of babies laughing a bit intrusive...
Because, Barrak Obama won the election because of Youtube
Because Barrak Obama won the election because of Youtube.

Wait did I say Youtube? I meant the black vote.
And I think that Youtube and Fred are so cool
And What The Buck will be back in a jiffy lube...

So welcome to Youtube
Yeah, I said welcome to Youtube
Hey, Welcome to Youtube

I said listen and linger,
Charlie the unicorn bit my finger.
It's Youtube, The impact is evident,
Ms. Teen South Carolina just ran for vice president...

Upload a video you got nothin' to lose, Except all of your friends...
And the approval of your parents

Hi, my name is Mary and I'm 19 years old and I got drunk at a party and I think someone was videotaping it but I don't want anyone to see it 'cause I showed half of my boob...
Sorry Mary,

Welcome to Youtube
Say hello to Youtube
Say goodbye to your college scholarship

Yeah, and it'll keep on going and it'll never stop,
'Till it's privatized

Thanks.