If U Can't Dance Slide
Yo! If you can't dance, its cool to get up now
Yeah, see, usually, ya'll stand off on the side
You know, you a little embarassed or whatever
But this is one of them joints for everybody
So get on up, but keep it simple, slide
[chorus]
If you can't dance then this is your jam, baby
Left to right all night
Slide that's all you gotta do
You can't dance then this is your jam, baby
Left to right all night, slide, that's all you gotta do
Now we all know the boy at the club, all liquored up
Boy with the bub tryin' to pick 'em up, wack dancing
'Wooking pa nub', shirt too bright, pants too tight
Boy, settle down
Now I ain't just messing with you
I got better things to do
I'm trying to help, I got a lesson for you
I know you do the best you could do
Wanna get next to Boo, then the less you do the better
Cause women equate dance with sex
They gon' see you and be like, next
But you gon' be like, "Hold up, Ma" (next)
But she gon' be like, uh huh boy (next)
Now looka-here, rule #1, know ya name
if it ain't Usher, Justin, or Hammer, then we can touch ya
Rule #2, never do a dance you can't do, why stupid
Cause you can't do it
[chorus]
So I'm up in my spot in Miami the other night, right
And this dude's out on the floor OD-ing, just way
over-dancing
You know, so his Mommy wanna holla at me
She thought my name was Billy, I told her it was Willie
She said she watch my TV show and I was very silly
Told her I was from Philly she looked at me said, "Really?"
And judging from her t-shirt, I could tell that she was
chilly
So I gave her my sweater, she said her name was Etta
She said she come from Cuba and she just had bought a Jetta
She said she glad I met her, let's go somewhere together
She said she'd ride in my car cause she knew my car was
better
The conversation cookin', attention getting' tookin'
My Spidey senses tinglin', I felt somebody lookin'
Now who this brotha lookin', & now he runnin', bookin'
I'm mad I'm like a fisherman, I almost had my hook in
I figured I should get up & quickly clear my head up
Cause Etta got a man, got me feelin' kinda set-up
Now Dude was really fed up and yo, he wouldn't let up
Homey if I hit you, you might never ever get up
Now he was not a dancer, plus he wasn't handsome
Comin' like Mel Gibson, like I had his girl for ransom
Pedro wanna go out side, yo amigo, tranquillo... slide
[chorus]
Now, Rule #3 is easy, please remember that you ain't on
"Beat Street"
Sweet feet, you ain't tryin' to win no TV, another dude did
a move
No need to out do it
Rule #4, out on the floor, don't be doing moves
That don't nobody do no more
Draw too much attention to be adventurous on the floor
There's a reason that don't nobody do 'em no more, you feel
me?
This may be hilarious, but Rule #5 is serious
It's a shame we even have to discuss
That there's no lip biting or pelvic thrusts
I mean you think that move will put the sting on her
you too close, tryin' to put a ring on her?
You don't know that girl, don't cling on her
And don't put your thing on her cool
[chorus]
Autor(es): TROY JOHNSON, WILLARD SMITH
