If a Girl Answers (Don't Hang Up)
Brenda, how are we gonna get 2 the party? 
Call up Jimmy, he's got a car
And what if a girl answers? 
Hang up
Hang up nothin', Jimmy says I was his girl 
Honey, don't you know everyone's Jimmy's girl?
Brenda, I know better than anybody 
Well, if a girl answers, don't hang up, just talk about her
Yes
Hello, this is Vanity
Is Jimmy home?
Yes, but he's taking a shower
Oh, I see 
Did he just take out the trash?
No, that's somethin' he use 2 do 
Now he's taking out me
Oh, I see 
Well, tell 'em he left his pants over here last night
That's OK, you keep 'em
He won't be needin' 'em 2 night
Oh, what's the matter 
Is he going swimming?
Why no, we was gonna go 
But he said he did that last night
Well sugar, I know about a great party 
Why don't you bring us your car?
So sorry baby, but I never go 2 singles' bars
Singles? Is that what you think? 
Tramp, I'm datin' your dad
Oh, he died about 7 years back 
Now ain't that just 2 bad?
Well, that's how we like 'em - tall, stiff and ready 
That's positively more than I can say 4 dead Jimmy
That's because he was swallowin' vitamin E 
Now he's swallowin' me
Oh, you mean you were swallowin' him 
Why don't you just tie a mattress 2 your back?
I'm gonna need it 'cause if I ever see your face 
I'm gonna fall and have a heart attack
All that's gonna fall is the wig off your head 
Now what you think about that?
I think I'd rather wear a wig 
Than run a motel 4 roaches, ants and lice 
Dogs and cats in my hat
Hey, that's goin' 2 far 
Here, give me the phone 
Hey tramp, take a bath in puke 
What's more, you can kiss where the sun don't shine 
If that don't work, we can duke 
You see, the only kinda man that would play with you 
Is one that plays with himself 
None of my friends could stand the sight of you 
Much less the smell 
And if I weren't a lady, I'd take my money 
And buy you a brand new face 
Then I'd take my underwear and stick it in your mouth 
And you'd love it 'cause you got no taste 
And if that don't work, call back your dead daddy 
And show him what you look like now 
Honey, I'd bet he never come back 
'cause you one ugly cow (Ooh-wee) 
Girl, you tell your boyfriend Jimmy he can go and get hit by a car 
'cause as far as I see it, he can't afford 2 bite the beat of this star 
There's 2 things we can't stand 
One's a jive talk man 
The other's a jive talk man with no money 
Can you dig it?
Click
If a girl answers, don't hang up {x4} 
Don't hang up {x8} 
If a girl answers, don't hang up, don't hang up {x2} 
Don't hang up {repeat 2 fade}
Writer/s: PRINCE ROGERS NELSON, TERRY STEVEN LEWIS